Its So Funny.. Must Read

A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that, because he was't wearing his seat belt, he had just won $1,000 in a safety competition.

''What are you going to do with the prize money ?'' the officer asked. The man responded, ''I guess I'll go to driving school and get my license.'' 

At that moment, his wife, who was seated next to him, chimed in, ''Officer, don't listen to him. He's a smart ass when he's drunk.''

This woke up the guy in the back seat, who, when he saw the cop, blurted out, ''I knew we wouldn't get far in this stolen car.'' 

At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a voice asked ''Are we over the border yet ?''

After Few Days Later,

One night a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. 

At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. 

The man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes.

Meanwhile, all the other patrons left the bar and drove off. 

Finally he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. 

As soon as he pulled onto the street, the officer stopped him, read him his rights and administered the breathalyzer test to determine his blood-alcohol content.

The results showed a reading of 0.0.

The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
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